Words - Use them, listen to them

Words are your most powerful relationship management tool, so it is important in your relationship that you learn to use them correctly and learn to listen to them correctly. This is especially true in early relationships while you are still learning to anticipate your partner (which you will never fully master because, well, people change).

In our relationship, we started to anticipate each other by finish each others sentences or thoughts. In public with friends this is a neat party trick, and when you are on the same wavelength (eg. food) this can be very beneficial. But for us this proved dangerous and lead to bickering because we occasionally made incorrect assumptions in sensitive situations about the other person and what they were going to say. As a result, this often lead to further conflict as we only infuriated each other more by not allowing the other to finish their thought independently, or by making incorrect assumptions; neither of you can mind read.

Of course, it is a two way street where not only do you need to listen, but you need to learn to clearly and appropriately express yourself and your feelings. In relationships where vocal dominance can be a problem - you are cut off and as a result often give up fighting to express your thoughts - it is important to push forward and finish your thought, clarify your intention, or express your true feeling.

So the next time you find yourself cut off or finishing a sentence you didn't start, take a moment to take a breath and remember to use your words, and listen to all of each others words, because words are your most powerful relationship management too.


TL;DR - Learn to speak and to listen before you learn to anticipate your partner; neither of you can mind read.

- Mr